Left Right Divorce

This is a final draft of a Divorce agreement between conservatives and those others...

Dear American liberals, leftists, social progressives, socialists, Marxists and Obama supporters, et al:

We have stuck together since the late 1950's for the sake of the kids, but the whole of this latest election process has made me realize that I want a divorce... I know we tolerated each other for many years for the sake of future generations, but sadly, this relationship has clearly run its course.

Our two ideological sides of America cannot and will not ever agree on what is right for us all, so let's just end it on friendly terms. We can smile and chalk it up to irreconcilable differences and go our own way.

Here is a model separation agreement:

Our two groups can equitably divide up the country by landmass each taking a similar portion. That will be the difficult part, but I am sure our two sides can come to a friendly agreement. After that, it should be relatively easy! Our respective representatives can effortlessly divide other assets since both sides have such distinct and disparate tastes.

We don't like redistributive taxes so you can keep them. You are welcome to the liberal judges and the ACLU. Since you hate guns and war, we'll take our firearms, the cops, the NRA and the military. We'll take the nasty, smelly oil industry and you can go with wind, solar and biodiesel. You can keep Oprah, Michael Moore and Rosie O'Donnell (You are, however, responsible for finding a bio-diesel vehicle big enough to move all three of them).

We'll keep capitalism, greedy corporations, pharmaceutical companies, Wal-Mart and Wall Street. You can have your beloved lifelong welfare dwellers, food stamps, homeless, homeboys, hippies, druggies and illegal aliens. We'll keep the hot Alaskan hockey moms, greedy CEO's and rednecks. We'll keep the Bibles and give you ABC, NBC, CBS, CNN and Hollywood . We will keep Fox and talk radio.

You can make nice with Iran and Palestine and we'll retain the right to invade and hammer places that threaten us. You can have the peaceniks and war protesters. When our allies or our way of life are under assault, we'll help provide them security.

We'll keep our Judeo-Christian values.. You are welcome to Islam, Scientology, Humanism, political correctness and Shirley McClain. You can also have the U.N.. But we will no longer be paying the bill.

We'll keep the SUV's, pickup trucks and oversized luxury cars. You can take every Subaru station wagon and Volvo (now owed by the Chinese) you can find.

You can give everyone healthcare if you can find any practicing doctors. We'll continue to believe healthcare is a luxury and not a right. We'll keep The Battle Hymn of the Republic and the National Anthem. I'm sure you'll be happy to substitute Imagine, I'd Like to Teach the World to Sing, Kum Ba Ya or We Are the World.

We'll practice trickle down economics and you can continue to give trickle up poverty your best shot.


Since it often so offends you, we'll keep our history, our name and our flag.

Would you agree to this? If so, please pass it along to other like minded liberal and conservative patriots and if you do not agree, just hit delete. In the spirit of friendly parting, I'll bet you Answer which one of us will need whose help in 15 years.

Sincerely,
John J. Wall
Law Student and an American

P. S. Also, please take Ted Turner, Sean Penn, Martin Sheen, Barbara Streisand, & Jane Fonda with you.

P. S. S. And you won't have to press 1 for English when you call our country.

Truth because it's Published?

-Cross posted from Michigan Taxes Too Much-

Much like the "philosophical" meanderings you would find scratched on the walls of the typical bathroom stall at the airport, bar, restroom at the local elementary school, Daily KOS readers are energized daily with all the truths they need to know. And in the same vein, Air America and its Dozens, or possibly hundreds of listeners are given a dose of Randy Rhodes' version of Sarah Palin's life.

So.. do you believe it? Here is a new Bumper sticker. Click on it to see the full size version if you like.



They must.. we SAID so.

An exercise by Right Michigan's Nick De Leeuw suggests the above Bumper sticker has merit. Or does it? The question of whether people believe many of the lies told to defame those whom they philosophically disagree can be summed up with a recent conversation I had with a very good customer. I should preface this with a statement of fact that I cannot for the life of me SHUT UP when doing my sales gigs. Fortunately I read the writing on the wall and didn't push the issue, and will be a little more careful for the sake of my future business dealings.

ME: "So what do you think about that Palin pick?"

Cust: "Yeah wow no kidding. It's the first time I ever donated to a presidential campaign.."

ME: "Me too, wow what an unbelievable pick.."

Cust: "But the donation wasn't to McCain! That woman is Corrupt and in the pockets of big oil! as well as that apparently she is taking credit for her 17 year old daughter's kid, and fired some guy who was going to expose her..."

Pretty much at that point I knew it was best to pursue a "business only" relationship, as I know that many can become very emotional once they make up their minds on a political issue. It proved to me however, that REALLY DECENT PEOPLE can be taken in by.. CRAP. IT doesn't mean they are stupid, uneducated or even totally politically ignorant. It simply means that in the fight for our thoughts and minds, a well constructed half, or even quarter truth can be made believable by a fine crafter of words such as many who inhabit the liars den known as the KOS.

In the writings here, I can only hope I am able to present the truths as they are best told. If I am wrong in a fact presented, I hope that I am called on it, so that it may be presented properly, and ethically correct. For all of the few readers I have collected, I wish to make it my responsibility to deliver facts fairly and honestly, and hopefully the opinions are easily separated from fact.